How to take care of yourself while caring for others
by Deb Shell, AMFT
The world is heavy right now. Being human is complex and as a therapist, you are constantly giving to others. You listen to their problems, offer support, and help them to work through their challenges. But it's important to remember that you can't give from an empty cup. If you don't take care of yourself, you'll eventually burn out. You are human just like your clients which means you are complex. You have your own emotions to deal with alongside the emotions of your clients and that is a lot to hold.
We are like sponges. We start out dry and we can take in as much liquid as we can hold until we are full and it starts to seep out. When you feel like your sponge is full, it is important to find ways to ring out the access liquid and prepare it for what it will need to hold next.
Maya Angelou said it perfectly, "As you grow older, you'll notice you have two hands. One for helping yourself, and one for helping others." While many therapists have traits of selflessness, don't be misled to believe this is selfless work. A therapist must think of themselves in order to do the work. It is part of the job description if you plan for longevity in the field.
Here are a few tips for therapists on how to take care of themselves while caring for others:
Set boundaries. "Boundaries are the distance between loving you and loving myself." Find what that distance is and make sure you are holding those boundaries with your clients, personal relationships, and yourself.
Take care of your physical health. Make sure you're getting enough sleep, eating healthy foods, and exercising regularly. Keep a jump rope in the living room. Take a walk every morning. Turn on a YouTube dance video and learn some new moves.
Find healthy ways to manage stress. Take a hike in nature, clean the house, paint, play an instrument, put on your noise-canceling headphones, and meditate, share a coffee with a friend. We each have ways that are unique to ourselves to release stress or find a way to sit in the stress with support.
Have a support system. This could include other therapists, supervisors, friends, or family members. EBTC is a great place to meet other therapists and find people who you can turn to in those moments when you need support.
Take time for yourself. It's important to schedule time for yourself each week to do things that you enjoy. This could include a nature hike, reading, making art, getting lost in music, spending time with loved ones, or pursuing hobbies.
Taking care of yourself is essential for therapists who want to provide high-quality care to their clients but also want to practice what they preach. By following these tips, hopefully, you can reduce your risk of burnout and improve your overall well-being.
Deb Shell, AMFT
Master's in Counseling Psychology
The Wright Institute