Consultation Groups for Couples Therapists

Author: Kathleen Haley, LMFT

Have you ever felt isolated as a couples therapist?

Are your colleagues all individual therapists who don’t understand what seeing couples is like?

One way to increase connection with other therapists is to join or start a couples consultation group.

There are two types of consultation groups that I know of.

• One is a professionally led consultation group where a fee is charged.

• Another is a peer-led consultation group, which is free to members.

It is rare to find either of these groups that focus primarily on couples, which is what couples therapists need. Consultation groups can address the isolation most private practice therapists face. It can provide a chance to build relationships with other couples therapists and find trusted referrals. A group can give a therapist emotional support to assist with the unique stresses experienced by couples counselors. The consultation group can be a safe place to share strategies and get help with challenging cases.

Because it is so hard to find consult groups specifically addressing the needs of couples therapists, I have found it works best to create your own peer consultation group.

You may ask, how do I do this? Where do I start?

In my experience, it works best to find someone to run it with you, a co-leader who can be a “thought partner” in setting up the group and be available if you can’t be there. You can put out a call on your email listserve groups to find like-minded therapists. If you put out a call for members, I predict you will be inundated with requests. You can also contact colleagues you know and trust.

Once you have a co-leader, you will want to establish group guidelines for the number of participants, confidentiality rules, format, and screening criteria. Decide how often you want to meet.  Consider providing an outline for presenting cases. Decide how you will handle inappropriate participants.

I participate in a weekly peer-led couples consultation group where we only consult about couples. We have been meeting for over three years now. We meet on Zoom and have six members, which feels just right to me. This number allows for each person to present a case every 6 weeks and ensures enough attendees if someone can’t make it to the group. I have included the group agreement we use below so you can use it as a sample. Each participant signs the agreement before they join.

If possible, let your couple know you will be seeking confidential consultation before you bring the case to your group. Tell them you will be disguising any information that could reveal who they are. Be sure to take notes on any of your cases that are discussed and enter them in your clients’ records. Write down the names of the therapists attending the group meeting. Noting in the client’s chart that consultation was done demonstrates your thoroughness of care.  If, in the future, you are questioned about your decisions, showing that you sought out appropriate consultation could be important.

I have no doubt that you will be pleased with having your own couples consultation group, and your couples counseling will improve as well.

SAMPLE COUPLES CONSULTATION GROUP AGREEMENT

We are two co-leaders, _____________and ______________, setting up a consultation group to focus on couples/relationship counseling. In order to provide a safe, confidential space, we wanted to list a few agreements and ask people to agree to them.

1. We would like the consultation group to meet every Thursday at 2 pm for 50 minutes. We will respect people’s time, as many must start with a client session right at 3 pm.

2. In order to have ample time to consult, we would ask to have only one case presented at each session. We would also ask members to be mindful of making sure everyone gets a chance to speak to the case.

3. We want to emphasize confidentiality by not sharing client’s names or any identifiable information and not talking about what goes on in this meeting with people outside. We would also request that if a member realizes they know the client(s) being discussed, they will quietly leave the group for that day.

4. The co-leaders will each take a role either as process facilitator or as content facilitator.

5. In order to promote safety while we each express the vulnerability of presenting our own case, we ask people to speak respectfully to each other. In case of interpersonal conflict, we would like to use a “Calling In” process rather than a “Calling Out” process. To that end, we would like each of you to read over the Calling In document we have sent you.

6. If you are in agreement with these items, please sign and date this page below and return it to the facilitators.

Thank you, and welcome to the group!

Leaders:

Name:

Date: